It's Kissing Time!

Tips for kissing under the mistletoe that you can use all year round!  By Mike Hardcastle

What do you do when your year long crush heads over to you with a valentine in hand? Or even worse, how do you handle it when the person who has been crushing on you all year long rushes over with the mystical branch in tow? Don't fret. Relax! Kissing seems to be a regular part of the winter holidays and many otherwise shy people use the old  mistletoe and valentine tradition to get smooches from their crushes without putting their feelings out on the line. With this in mind, how should you handle it? Rather than running away in panic, quickly examine the situation and then use the tips outlined below.

What to do when you're kissing someone:
You don’t like
You like as a friend
You might like - unsure
You have a crush on
You just start dating
You have a relationship with

#1- Kissing someone you don't really like:
Be polite. Smile. Turn your face and offer them your cheek. Hold stead fast to this gesture and if they move to get your lips, well, turn the other cheek. You are never under any obligation to let somebody kiss you on the lips, but a polite social peck on the cheek never hurt anyone. Rather than look like a scrooge when a person you don't ever want to lock lips with traps you under the mistletoe, offer them your cheek and follow up with a simple peck on theirs. No arms around each other, no hand holding, no extra touching whatsoever, only a peck and a smile. Then say something nice, smile and walk away (quickly). They'll get the message that you aren't interested while still maintaining their dignity (a nice holiday gesture, don't you think?).
Super Savvy Tip:
As you leave turn on the charm and say, "Can I borrow that mistletoe?". Then, when this person is out of sight, use the mistletoe on the person you really want to be kissing.

#2- Kissing someone you like as a friend:
This one depends on how good a friend we are talking about. Is it just another member of your group? A quick peck on the cheek or lips will do fine. Is it a good bud? You might want to linger for an instant longer. All kisses to friends should be closed mouth kisses - you don't want anybody getting the wrong idea. No need to put your arms around each other, but if you are good friends there is also no harm in this. For a funny little variation on the friendly kiss, grab a buddy by the head and shower them with little kisses all over the face, like you would a baby. Sweet!
Super Savvy Tip:
After the kiss is over, throw in a quick hug and add, "I am so glad you're my friend!", just so there is no room for confusion or gossip.

#3- Kissing someone you might like
(when you aren't quite sure):
This is an excellent chance to test the chemistry between you. The kiss you give in this situation should fall somewhere between what you'd give to a bud and what you would give to a full fledged crush. Think short and sweet with a hint of passion. Also, make sure that there is some other body contact. Putting your arms around each other is nice, but if it seems to be too much, holding hands works too. Whatever you do, do not venture in to the realm of french kissing, but opening your mouth ever so slightly adds an element of intimacy. This kiss should last more than a second but less than 15 seconds. Too long and you run the risk of sending an undeniable "I am in to you!" message. Too short and you may give the person an unintended brush off.
Super Savvy Tip:
If the kiss made you see stars, linger a while by holding hands or staying arm in arm, and smile. If the kiss made you feel silly, smile and say, "Thanks!", then head straight for your nearest friend.

#4- Kissing someone you have a crush on
(when it is clear they are interested too):
This may very well be the most exciting type of kiss there is. It is so full of promise and good natured lusty feelings. You don't know this person well enough to love them yet, but you sure feel something so strong toward them that it makes you breathless. Fight that feeling. To make this kiss memorable you are going to have to breath. It is probably still too early to try french kissing, but making it a little wet won't hurt. Start with a gentle closed mouth peck and move on to something a little more inviting - open mouth but no tongue. Try to keep your lips soft, not too puckered, and make sure that your arms are around your partner. A couple of kisses in a row is a nice idea. Try not to let this kiss linger too long or you may find yourself making out. Making out with a crush too quickly has spelled doom to many could-have-been romances. Make sure the kiss has a definite end and that you both stay on the same planet as the rest of the party-goers.
Super Savvy Tip:
When the kiss is over, invite your crush to hang out with you a bit more. If there is dancing, suggest a turn on the floor. Or hold hands and join a group of people talking. Keep holding hands so people can see that, right now, you are "together".

#5- Kissing someone you have just started dating:
If this isn't your first date, chances are you have kissed before (if not, see the tips for kissing a crush, so a turn under the mistletoe shouldn't be that frightening. But that doesn't mean it isn't special. A mistletoe kiss with a new steady can be something you will never forget. For this reason, it should be a little different than your other kisses. Holding each other close is a definite must. Start kissing the same as you have in the past. Play with each others hair or run your fingers up and down one another's back. If you have never french kissed before, now may be a good first time. If you aren't ready to French kiss yet, try what we Canadians call a "Quebec kiss". This type of kiss is a shorter, dryer version of the French kiss with only a little bit of tongue playing. If you aren't ready for that either, try spicing up the kiss with a little bit of fun, playfully tickle your partner to signal that it is over or end with a gentle kiss on the nose or forehead.
Super Savvy Tip:
Stay in each other's arms even after the kiss is over and talk. Talk about the kiss and how nice it was, talk about the party and how fun it is, and then lean in for another quick smooch.

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