You won't amount to nothing

I wish you were never born

These were my burning words of encouragement

Cutting deep into my skin like razor edged thorns


Yet still I try to prove, I am worthy, I am good

Making myself feel special, like every child wants and should

I learned to act and speak different,

I cared less, and I did whatever I could

Some tools of survival needed

To stand tall with no pain or fear on that corner in my hood

As I grew into a teen, so did the inner rage

Now knowing my life of destruction

Will land me in a cage

I am what I am

Making shocking news on the front page

Now years have past, I am all 15

My hustle, my dreams, started to fail

Now those who weren't there to help me

Kindly cry out "I told you so"

And the end, well, is me landing in jail



Behind bars I still ask Who are you? Where were you?

What did you tell me when I was younger?

I was hurting, needing my tears wiped and a hug

Instead of a kiss on the cheek,

I got feed yourself and maybe a goodnight

You words help groomed me to be a thug



Looking back now on the mistakes I made

When I thought I was growing into a Man

Life got really messed up and I had to look at how I am responsible

I had to accept and get ready to change my game plan



To know who I am and where I am going

I must know from where I came

Letting go of the blame, the path marked with sorrow, misconception

Lies, deceit and the deep rooted pain



Taking my walk down the dark winding road with no ending

Funny it is nothing like how I thought a fairy tale should go

The end, the beginning are all messed up

Lost dreams hopes and days, I'll never know



It was hard but I made it back

I stand again taking another glance back at my life

The yesterday, when I walked down the street

Hand held tightly gripped to my knife

And today I have to take a breath

And look forward to a chance to make me right



Today, I look forward

I'm standing full of wisdom, given a second chance as I plan for the now

My yesterday, I accept as done

My today: getting to know me for I am who I am

My tomorrow is in learning the how